i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
