And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
