I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize