Where are you?
In a non slutty way
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
