Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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