Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize