I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
