I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
