he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
