Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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