Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
