i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
