My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Panties = found
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