Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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