I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize