I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
