I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
