But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Randomize
