I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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