Is it normal to miss your booty call?
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
