just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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