girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
