wakey wakey hands off snakey
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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