I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
