I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
