I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Randomize
