you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I want her autograph on my taint
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
