Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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