I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Randomize
