You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Randomize
