you turned your livingroom into a bong?
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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