In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
OPIZZABONMYDICK
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Randomize
