I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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