good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
Randomize
