I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize