We're facebook friends in real life
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
