I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
