This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
BRING THE BAGELS
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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