I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
