I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
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