i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
