remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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