I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
