i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
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