Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
