Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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