he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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