Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Randomize
