is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
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