fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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